Day 365: Next Year

So it's been one year since I have started losing weight. One year since that little switch in my head turned on, and although sometimes it dims, manages to never completely shut off. Three hundred and sixty-five days (probably more because my counting of the days might have been off here or there).... frankly, it's felt a lot longer, but not necessarily because of the weight.

I think this has been the most eventful 365 days in my entire life. From extreme highs to extreme lows - a rollercoaster I will never forget. From beginning this journey, deciding to blog about it - something I definitely felt silly doing for a long while, graduating University, worrying about the future, being rejected by nursing school, being accepted into Nuclear Medicine, going blonde, going to Cancun, searching for a place to live downtown for months, starting a new school, commuting to school, moving into a new place, having to tell landlord I was moving out of new place, looking for a condo, buying a condo, moving into a condo, painting the condo, (still) organizing a condo, more school, close encounters with the male kind, friend visits, school stresses, joined intramurals, made new friends, forced myself out of my normal box.

I like the person that I have become. I appreciate her confidence and perseverance over tough times. I rarely let the bad stuff get to me for very long. And although the last two weeks have been difficult on the scale, this is not a reflection of my day-to-day life. No, my normal weeks include lots of exercise, decent amounts of sleep, my full amount of water, a vitamin each day and the ability to choose my foods wisely. Besides my stupid knee, I am feeling good, looking good - I mind less and less the image in the mirror, even naked.

In one year I have managed to lose 55lbs - almost exactly one pound per week when averaged out. It sounds a little disappointing that way, but what that means is I didn't gain weight over the past year, and I didn't just stop at losing 10%, or 20% or even when I managed to get down to my previously lowest-ever weight (217lbs) like I have done every other time. As difficult as those goals were - certainly more difficult the closer I got to them in that weird, self-sabotage kind of way - I managed to just stick through it.

Now for the real test... getting under 200lbs. This will honestly be the biggest challenge of my life. I know that because the unknown is always scary, despite the allure and charm of being merely 'overweight' instead of 'obese' and beginning to blend in more with society. I am not sure I will know how to handle it, even now I am getting different kinds of attention than I have ever received and it's a challenge to stay grounded and true to myself. However, even saying that, it's likely that I will change with my body. I can't be the same person and maintain the weight loss... something has to change inside me for this to be permanent. I am changing.

It's my goal to lose the next 45lbs before Feb 27, 2009 - considering the past year, this is totally doable.

So here is to another year of losing weight (the last, I hope!) and to my first year of blogging (in March) and to a new life as a new person - inside and out! And same to all of you - I am so proud to call you guys friends. We will all succeed! I really appreciate all the readers and all the comments - it has definitely helped me through this long, arduous (but completely worthwhile) journey...


Hmm... what does 55lbs look like?? Well... after some google image searching... this pike (?)
looked pretty impressive - so I have lost a 'pike' in weight (it's better than the dead deer I found).
And so what does 55lbs look like on me? Well...
The Before:

And the after (in progress):